Becoming a housewife

I’ve finally put the big girl panties on and moved out of mommy and daddy’s house! During this past month it has given me time to reflect on certain observations. It could be temporary insanity, too much idle time or just lack of adult communication… call it what you will. The following are my real confessions of an Idaho housewife.

My first observation involves commercials. One in particular that really makes me laugh includes a special yogurt. They film compensated consumers to tell the “truth” about their product. Really?! Instead of saying the product is “regulating their digestion” let’s speak some truth here. They’ve seen an increase in the Hershey squirts.

Secondly, this sarcasm deal makes it difficult to make friends. For example, during a recent weight watchers meeting, the meeting leader didn’t know when to take me serious or not. I can just predict her thinking… Is this chick really asking me for the phone number of my OB/GYN, and making jokes about her spin class in the same breath? Yes ma’am! That skinny little bicycle seat rode up so far I’m gonna need the doc to retrieve it. Next time I’ll save my money and buy a thong 2 sizes too small.

So needless to say, I’m going to leave the friend making up to my hubs. And I suppose cutting back on my commercial intake could inspire a little more activity… promoting more weight loss! 14 pounds shed so far seems like a small dent in the 50 lbs. I have left. And the adult contact may cut down on the awkward smiles I give to everyone I pass in Target with the secret thought they’re could be sipping vino on the terrace with me next week while we discuss “Glee.”

I miss you all, including my sanity. So feel free to pick up that telephone, call the desperate housewife, but be prepared for an earful… it’s kinda building up. Thanks for reading!